Thursday, September 11, 2008

Nappy Changes


I wanted to talk about a process in my house that is not so close to my heart!

I didn't realise when told that I was having twins that this would be such a source of frustration to me! Trelise as a baby was an angel when it came to nappy changes. She would lie still on the change table and allow me to quickly take care of business.

Oh how my life has changed. Maddie and Jules are sweet, fun loving babies until it comes time for nappies or clothes to be changed! Then the 'fun' begins!

First task to to identify the baby that is the best target for capture. I have found that Trelise is a good sheepdog and is quite handy at rounding up a rowdy sister if needed. All those trips to Lindale have not been for nothing!

Once baby has been caught wrestling them to the ground is the next challenge. For little girls they are quite skillful and usually it will take me 2 or 3 attempts to get them in a position where removing clothes and nappies is possible.

Right, so I have a baby down on the ground. With these two I wouldn't even attempt a change table unless I had rope to tie them down with. I then start to remove the layers and layers of clothing they are wearing. As I am doing this I'm so looking forward to summer and less clothes and hoping like mad that anything in the nappy has stayed in the nappy.

Now knowing my luck I will have hit a jackpot and a full clean up job will be necessary. For most people this is annoying but not particularly stressful. In our house however this task generally is performed with one hand as the other is needed to hold back the other child from beating her defenseless sister over the head with whatever weapon is around. No weapon no problem poking eyes or any type of face pulling has the same effect and once this gets boring turning attention to your mother and attempting to climb on her also increases the nappy changing challenge.

We have had a bout of nappy rashes currently so I'm using a variety of creams and powders to solve the problem. Generally I look up just to see the tube I'm about to use disappearing and being swung around like some sort of baby trophy.

Getting clothes back on the child is the next step. Sound effects usually kick in now. Jules has developed a high pitched scream that is most unpleasant to the ears. Legs and arms are going crazy and the child is flipping over constantly. Usually I manage to get clothes back on them with only 2 or 3 escapes. About now a niggling pain in my back appears.

I release the beast and strangely she usually lies on her back laughing.

The best thing

I'm only halfway through!!!!

14 comments:

AVTCOACH said...

Came over from Wordful Wednesday. Your Wednesday picture was so cute! What caught my attention was your description of those nappie changes! It is hysterical, you are a good writer and painted a fun picture of the experience. I guess I laughed out loud at your expense.

Stephanie said...

Oh I hear you! I recently had a post about poopy pants. Diaper changes in this house are very stressful for me, as you perfectly described. And as you said...you're only half through.

Threeundertwo said...

Oh, do I remember those days.

It was such a happy time when they were all potty-trained!

Jaime said...

This is pretty funny Jocasta! You wrote it very well and I can't help but laugh!
Also having to get used to hearing them called nappies. I think the very first time I heard you say that I didn't know what you were talking about. I figured it out quickly;)

angie said...

Oh......makes me thankful that my twins never gave me a problem. Whew.

Anonymous said...

Child restraint has unecessary bad press!
Imagine a giant Dr Seuss mechanical nappy changing device with hands holding the baby (white gloved of course) and still more hands doing the job and at the same time the storytelling/baby entertainment process (optional extra) can be pressed!
Surely that cant be wrong?!

Anonymous said...

Child restraint has unecessary bad press!
Imagine a giant Dr Seuss mechanical nappy changing device with hands holding the baby (white gloved of course) and still more hands doing the job and at the same time the storytelling/baby entertainment process (optional extra) can be pressed!
Surely that cant be wrong?!

Laura said...

That is totally funny. My girls tortured me in every way possible at this stage. If it wasn't catching them to change them then it was removing the diapers at nap and painting the bed,walls etc.... Too many times to count. Pray they don't learn the latter. It's just TERRIBLE!

Tracy said...

I could have written this exact same post - except you did it better. why is it easier to laugh at your experience when I get SO frustrated when it happens to me. ahhhh

Casey's trio said...

I was lucky...never had too much of a hassle with changing and when I did, I just pinned them down with my legs!

Shannon said...

I have seen this before. My kids were all pretty easy to change but I have been introduced to the diaper changing beasts before. I feel for you!

girlytwins said...

Hilarious post. You couldn't have written it better :) I felt like I was reading a page from my life story.

Classic MaMa said...

I can relate: my Scarlett was always a princess when it came to, well just about anything. Bubba, however, has turned changing a diaper in to a full contact sport.

Connie said...

Oh this made me laugh out loud!!! Things are very similar at our house!!